“You two always face each other not sian meh?”
Not sure how many times I have answered this kind of questions.
Honestly speaking, up till now I haven’t feel “sian” yet, even though we have been together for 10+ years. But having said that, we have only started working together for close to 2 years, so it might be too early to make any conclusions.
I’m glad that both of us have our own strengths and weaknesses to compliment each other, in a way that we don’t really touch or cross other’s job scope. But that does not come easy too. In the initial stage, we do fight, and we fight a lot. Normal married couple already have different views in their daily life, not to mention working together. I think my staff / interns are used to us quarreling in front of them.
It is not easy, because after quarreling, we can’t say ‘fine, I’m going to work” and leave home. We still have to face each other no matter how.
If you have plans to work together as a perfect husband and wife team.. Decide after you go through my pointers. This is only limited to working, I got no say in your marriage life hor!
1. Quarreling in front of your co-workers
I know a lot of people will say “hey, not good to quarrel in front of your workers..”
yah yah tell me that later, when things goes wrong, or doesn’t go
our my way I don’t think I can wait, go home, close door and trash it out.
I think I will grow old faster if I keep it to myself.
Anyway, it is easier said than done. Sometimes, it just feels so much better to trash it out on the spot, get things over and done with and we leave work happily, MOST of the time.
I think my interns and staffs are so used to us quarreling in front of them. Best is every time after quarrel, we will tell them, get used to it, we are like that. hahaha…
2. You suck lah!
Honestly, I don’t think you believe this is the harshest words we said to each other.. This is cyberspace and I’m a mom blogger (ahem), so i need to be cyber friendly. I do not encourage any personal attacks like ugly, you B*****, you smell.. etc. That’s too much. My hubby said my English sucks, I agree but this is personal attack! NO dinner for you!
3. Sleep together, hug together
All couples know the golden rules of not bringing quarrel to bed. This rules applies the same to us. One more rule, buy Queen Size bed. No way squeeze so best is to hug together. And whoever sleep outside is the LOOSER!! Ok joking, not loser, but if you take the initiative to sleep outside means you want the quarrel to carry on till the next day or forever!
And if you ask your the other half to sleep outside, erm why not you sleep outside?
Anyway there is only once hubby sleep outside after we have a super huge quarrel. But not that he wanted, because he deliver the stroller past 12mn and he was too shag he slept in the car for few hours. But it scared the shit out of me.
4. You can’t do without me..
Although there is a saying that every one is dispensable, but can you change your hubby who do shit jobs with you, get shit pay, do OT without complaining (ok maybe nag). Last time when I’m angry I shoot my hubby that I can do without him. He will say fine lor.. but still stick with me (I think he can’t live without me leh).
As days goes by, we slowly learn each other strength in different areas.
I’m strong at back-end, hubby strong in sales area. His strength is in English and my strength is in Chinese. We compliment each other well! As weaknesses will always takes its place to portray itself as THE bigger picture, it is therefore best to focus on each others’ strengths, especially when we are facing each other everyday almost 24/7. It definitely makes our life so much easier.
At the end of the day, both of us know that we have each other’s best interest at heart.
5. Be husband and wife again
In business, it is definitely a two-way relationship, just as how husband and wife work. It takes time for us to position ourselves at work. Like who should do the planning, who should be handling the customers, who’s doing the proposals etc. Starting, there was a lot of over lapping roles, again we end up quarreling telling each other to focus what they should be doing. Just like wife in charge of housework, husband don’t come and complain there and here is still dirty. Instead of giving such unpleasant “complaints”, we will start to give each other suggestions, from a different point of view.
Just like buying a new dishwasher, so your wife no need to wash plates or break them. *Suggestions*
a.ka. let’s stay together till our hair grows grey
When you build your business or even a employee in a company, you grow with the company, not only by age, but also in many areas. Feedback, research and consulting each other how our company/relationships and parents role can be improved.
Overall, having my hubby on board with my business and becoming a partner in business, is very worthwhile. Because of this working relationship, we exposed ourselves to more opportunities and ideas along the way.
To some, maybe is a mission impossible, but to me, I’m glad that because of our differences we make a good partner in business.